It’s October 2011 in New York City everyone is hitting up the local costume shop not for Halloween but for NY Comic Con held at the Javits Center. Some say this lovely little gathering brings together all the nerds of the metropolis who cannot afford a plane ticket to San Diego. That was perhaps true during its inaugural run in 2006 but in fact NY Comic Con has now become one of the largest conventions in New York City. This for-profit convention is so popular it almost justifies my pale complexion and lack of planned activities on Friday nights.
While gearing up for the 2011’s convention lets take a look at NY Comic Con 2010. While researching the hefty ticket cost it was revealed to me that NY Comic Con regard DaveMMR.com as press. As a regular correspondent and reader of the website (particularly my own work), Dave commissioned me (after hours of begging and pleading) to rush out with my favorite $8 target shirt and get as much video footage as I could.
My first attempts were to talk to the mainstream celebrities at the convention. That was immediately halted after Jerry “The King” Lawler heard my Andy Kaufman impression and I made Lou Ferrigno cry from a bone crushing hand shake. He mainly cried out of guilt from breaking my hand. Also the massive lines made it difficult to pull such big leaguers away from their $40 autographing and $50 photographing duties.
The goal then became to highlight the lesser know people of the convention, the little guy, the guy with no one near his booth who was so desperate for attention he was willing to talk to me. From that spawned a very educational experience in my life. One I will never forget and one I will share with you.
My first stop on this carnivorous adventure was with a gentlemen promoting his comic My Monkey’s Name is Jennifer published by SLG. The story was about a crazy monkey and a little girl. That’s really all he said about it. He did have some truffles of wisdom about getting published in the comic business. I am heavily paraphrasing here but the overall message was to write a story that appears to be original and show it to everyone at the conventions until they steal it and you can sue them or they print it and you end up talking to a schmuck like me at a comic convention. Perhaps for 2011 I will promote a story about a goat named Bea Arthur that lives with her mother and 2 others of similar age while they talk about all the sex they have and eat cake. I really miss the 80s/90s.
That lovely conversation was followed up with my swooning over sexy artist Emi Boz. She was hot, had seductive tattoos, a cute voice, and could draw but she didn’t really understand satire, or at least my feeble attempt at it. After admiring the zombie portraits she was promoting I asked her if she was ready for the Zombie Apocalypse, she informed it was never going to happen. It was at this point in my life I realized I wasted all my money stocking up on Spam and organizing a letter writing campaign for Chuck Norris’ help in the coming end of days.
In an attempt to get my bearings I proceeded to find a darkly dressed couple promoting an Oscar style online award show called The Apollo Awards. I know what you’re thinking and sadly it does not have any correlation with the show that follows Saturday Night Live. The goal of The Apollo Awards was to determine the best piece of Sci-Fi that was ever created. He was from New Zealand so he probably never heard of Star Wars. When I asked him what the best Science Fiction Film of all time, he shot daggers from his eyes and proceeded to tell me it was personal opinion.
He clearly is not a member of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. When I visited the website theapolloawards.com to cast my vote all I managed to see were pictures of planets. It was not very user friendly a year later and I still have no clue who won. So I declare the winner NBC’s smash hit The Cape. It doesn’t get better then a cop framed for a crime he didn’t commit, who proceeds to fake his death, befriend circus bank robbers that teach him how to seek justice while wearing a fancy silk cape.
It wouldn’t be a nerd convention without some cosplay and NY Comic Con had tons. There were some hot chicks, mostly paid actresses. While conversing with these enthused individuals it occurred to me, there really is no place on earth where I can get laid. While talking to a super hot Harley Quinn and Catwoman they proceeded to tell me they were dating, when asked for a demonstration it took everything in Catwoman’s constitution not to break character and slap me in the face. I was probably the first male she came across that could actual form words in her presence. Harley Quinn (ever the professional) deflected very nicely, and got all the demonstration I could ever ask for in my mind’s eye.
While the girls were sexy, the guys were....interesting characters. I will never forget the 7 foot tall Korean(?) from Final Fantasy X. His Christian name was William, he spent several years perfecting the costume and making the cardboard weapons in case the Zombie Apocalypse ever came to fruition. I told him to avoid talking to Emi Boz, mostly for her safety. When asked who he wanted to live on a tropical island with he told me no one because he was dead. I guess there isn’t such thing as an after life in Final Fantasy.
Before I end my rant about my time at NY Comic Con I want to talk about the crowds. The entire Jacob Javits Convention Center was packed to the brim with people, costumed and non-costumed. They were all walking in a massive crawl to their destinations one large room with lots of things to look at, to another large room with lots of things to look at. Eighty plus dollars well spent. The eye candy does help justify the trip but that’s only if you like women wearing leather and showing lots of cleavage. (WARNING: those were few and far between but well worth the view). Somewhere in the massive crowds and any excuse to take a dollar out of my pocket. I was not a nerd alone, but a nerd celebrating. I was celebrating the fact that every girl I ever spoke to in high school was wrong. I am not the biggest loser in the world. The guys who came all the way down to the convention to spend their time playing videos games at the computer terminals were. They didn't even need to leave their house to perform that hobby.
In closing I predict 2011 NY Comic Con will not only top; but also surpass, exceed, and trump last year. I am looking forward to meeting the new breed of person that attends this event as it continues to grow and expand in the years to come.